JONATHAN CORMUR: Hello Dork Squad. I'm Jonathan Cormur and you're listening to Dorktales Storytime, the podcast for kids and their pop culture-loving grown-ups.
THEME SONG: It's a beautiful day for a story, adventure and glory, new friends and old ones too. It's an excellent day to get swept away in a tail, so let us regale you.
REDGE: Alright let’s see….Pencils?
SERENA: Check!
JONATHAN: And sharpened!
REDGE: Erasers?
SERENA: Check!
REDGE: Paints and paintbrushes?
SERENA: Check! And we have our freshly prepared canvases!
JONATHAN: I also have scissors, charcoals, glue, crayons, markers…
SERENA: Do you think maybe we’ve over prepared for class?
REDGE: Hmmm…it’s possible. But now we can really let our creativity SHINE!
SERENA: That’s true!
JONATHAN: I’m so glad that they’re offering art classes at Peregrin's Place of Learning & Educational Excellence.
REDGE: Can you believe we get to go learn at one of the most esteemed schools in all of Once Upon a Time!
SERENA: It really is the perfect place to try something new.
JONATHAN: What was the name of our class again, Redge?
REDGE: The school brochure says it’s called “Blending the Rules 101” and the description is “Unleash the pigments of your imagination in this class of invention and inspiration taught by the famous painting duo– Peggy Pigasso and Victor Van Goat!”
JONATHAN: I forgot both Pigasso AND Van Goat are teaching this class!
REDGE: Isn’t it marvelous!
SERENA: I think this is going to be the perfect evening activity.
REDGE: A good chance to try something brand new! I cannot wait!
JONATHAN: Well, you won’t have to for much longer! We’ve almost arrived. Look! You can see the lights from the school entrance.
REDGE: Ooooo….I’ll race you there!
SERENA: Alright!
JONATHAN: You’re on!
REDGE: Last one to arrive is a silly goose!
BIG BAD: (A weak howl) Awooooo!
REDGE: Wait.
SERENA: What was that?
JONATHAN: I have no idea.
BIG BAD: (a slightly louder howl) AWOOOOO!
JONATHAN: It’s coming from over there!
REDGE: Behind that tree!
BIG BAD: (a slightly louder howl) AWOOOOOOOOOO!
SERENA: That sounds a lot like the Big Bad Wolf!
JONATHAN: You’re so right, Serena!
REDGE: Let’s go find him!
SERENA: Right behind you Redge!
JONATHAN: The sound was coming from just…over…here he is! Hi, Big Bad!
BIG BAD: Oh! Hello! I didn’t know anyone would be walking along this path at this hour…
REDGE: We’re on our way to our new art class!
BIG BAD: That explains all of the paintbrushes.
SERENA: Do you want to come with us? I’m sure there are extra spots open.
REDGE: And we certainly packed enough supplies for everyone.
BIG BAD: Oh no, that’s ok. Thank you though. I hope you enjoy!
REDGE: All…alright…
JONATHAN: Yeah…we’ll just mosey along…
SERENA: Unless…there’s something you need?
BIG BAD: Who me? No, no. I’m fine. I’m…I’m actually supposed to be taking my own class this evening.
REDGE: Oh really? How delightful! What are you taking? Dream Studies? Introduction to The Songs of Nighttime? Midnight Snack Cooking Class?
BIG BAD: It’s an Advanced Howling course.
SERENA: That sounds cool!
REDGE: But…you’re a wolf…don’t you already know how to howl?
BIG BAD: Sure I know the basics but I want to become a Master Howler. Did you know that there are 52 ways to howl at the moon?
JONATHAN: Really?
BIG BAD: Oh yes. Each requires a certain pitch, a specific emotion, very carefully chosen emphasis on the “Ahhhhs” and the “Woooos”.
SERENA: Wow!
JONATHAN: What are some of the howls?
BIG BAD: Let’s see…We’ve got the ‘Danger Alert’ howl, the ‘Everybody Boogie’ howl, the ‘Tummy Grumblin’ with Hunger’ howl, the ‘Calm, Cool, Collected Canine’ howl, the “I just finished a really awesome book and now I want to talk about it with everyone” howl. And the biggest, baddest one of all– the ‘Full Moon’ howl.
REDGE: I never knew there was so much involved with howling.
SERENA: If you’re supposed to be heading to class, why are you hiding between these trees?
BIG BAD: OH. Well I was just warming up my vocal chords, you see. Have to…make sure to…be ready to…I’M NOT GOING. I CAN’T DO IT. I WAS….I WAS HIDING!
SERENA: Oh no! What’s worrying you friend?
BIG BAD: Well, you see…I’m afraid I didn’t really nail my Intermediate Howling class and the advanced course will be too hard.
REDGE: I’m sure you’ll get right back into the swing of things Big Bad!
BIG BAD: I’m nervous that I’ve forgotten how to study! And how to practice. And there will be new students in the class who I’ve never met.
SERENA: That can be really nerve-wracking. But you’re awesome Big Bad! After giving it a little time…I bet you’ll make some brand new friends!
BIG BAD: AND…when I went to school last year, it didn’t go over so well. B’hoooooo.
JONATHAN: What happened?
BIG BAD: It was our last test before the end of the school year and it was a full moon, just like tonight. Professor Canis H. Claw took us to a campfire where we sat in a circle and took turns practicing our…Full Moon Howls. Fang went first, he’s got a deep rumbling howl that makes the trees tremble. Sprintz went second, she’s got such a bright tone that even the birds get jealous. And then it was my turn. But I forgot one key thing about campfires…
SERENA: What’s that?
BIG BAD: The moths come out! They’re drawn to the light! One giant moth was circling the fire and it accidentally made a big swoop just as I was inhaling, and it got caught in my throat!
SERENA: Oh no!
BIG BAD: Oh yes, I was choking and sputtering, coughing and hollering until the moth flew back out of my mouth again. But it was too late. All the other wolves were laughing at me. I was so embarrassed.
JONATHAN: Aw, I’m sorry Big Bad!
BIG BAD: I’ve been dreading going back to start a new school year ever since.. I can’t look those wolves in the eyes. What if I make a fool of myself again?
REDGE: Well first of all, it wasn’t fair of them to laugh at you when you were struggling.
SERENA: No, they could have shown more compassion.
BIG BAD: And what about Professor Claw? What if she thinks I can’t learn the fine art of baying? Or the proper way to project a yowl?
REDGE: Hmmm…Should we go poke your classmates with our quills and tell them to leave you alone…OR ELSE? Should we demand a meeting with your professor to tell her what’s what? That you’re the best howler in all of Once Upon a Time?
SERENA: Hold on a minute, Redge. I’m not so sure this is our business to get involved in.
JONATHAN: Are you saying we should stay out of Big Bad’s issues?
SERENA: Well, not completely. First, I want you to know that it’s common to have back to school jitters. And second, we’re rooting for you Big Bad. We want you to go into tonight feeling confident so you can be the best version of yourself.
BIG BAD: But how can I when my big feelings seem to be taking over once again?
SERENA: Remember last time when we all gave our emotions a name?
JONATHAN: Oh yes! I was overwhelmed.
BIG BAD: And I was sad!
REDGE: And I named mine TIMOTHY!
SERENA: You might have your stories a little mixed up, Redge. I think you were feeling…prickly.
REDGE: Oh yes, I’m always prickly.
BIG BAD: But here I am, not learning my lesson AGAIN. AWOOOOOO!
SERENA: Go a little easier on yourself, Big Bad! There’s no one-and-done approach to learning a new skill, and that includes mindfulness.
BIG BAD: There isn't?
SERENA: No! We keep returning to the lessons we’ve learned before, reflecting on them and refining our understanding of them!
REDGE: We do?!
SERENA: YES! But each time we revisit a challenge, we have an opportunity to see how far we’ve come since last time. We’re able to recognize our growth, and try new tools, and practice applying different skills at each opportunity.
JONATHAN: Wow, that’s an interesting way to look at growth, Serena.
SERENA: Growth is a spiral, not a straight line. We’re always looping back to what we’ve learned in the past, but while we move forward and build on what we knew before!
BIG BAD: I’ve been doing my breathing exercises, but they keep coming out as moans.
SERENA: Sometimes a favorite coping tool isn’t the right fit for the moment. That’s why very mindful people always have a few handy. Each time we retry in the face of an uncomfortable situation, moments of calm become easier and easier to enjoy. It’s a practice. May I share a new tip I think might work for times like this?
JONATHAN: Oh yes please!
BIG BAD: Anything!
REDGE: You heard the wolf!
SERENA: Okay, this exercise is “Top to Toes”—it’s a body scan. I want you to think about sending loving kindness to all parts of your body and your surroundings. From the bottom of your feet to the top of your head. Let’s all do it together!
SERENA leads them in a toes-to-top body scan.
SERENA: Let’s start by sitting down and getting comfortable. You can do this anywhere, standing, sitting, lying down…but since we’ve got some nice soft grass here, let’s sit.
Take a deep breath in now…and let it out. Breathe in…and breathe out. Breathe in…and out.
Now let’s focus on our bodies. How are we feeling right now?
We’re going to focus on the top of our head now, the forehead, and eyes. Relax your forehead and close your eyes if you’d like.
Moving down to the mouth, cheeks. Relax. Move your bottom teeth away from your top teeth, you can even relax your chin.
Relax your neck, your shoulders. Keep taking those deep breaths. You can put a hand on your belly and feel it going up and down as you breathe in and out.
Let’s focus on our legs and knees now. Relax your knees, let them fall to the sides and be loosey goosey.
Bring your focus on your whole foot, or, er, paws, and ankles. How are they feeling? Tired from walking? You can make circles with your ankles. Imagine that you’re drawing a circle with the tip of your big toe. Try this with both ankles.
Now let’s focus on our toes. Give them a wiggle. Scrunch them up tight, and let it go. Relax.
SERENA: OK friends, how about another?
REDGE/JONATHAN/BIG BAD: Oh please!
SERENA: Okay, this is a mindfulness technique to ground you (or feel more connected to what is around you right now), counting from one to five…
SERENA leads them in ONE thing you can taste, TWO things you can smell, THREE things you can hear, FOUR things you can touch, and FIVE things you can see around you exercise.
SERENA: We’re going to use our five senses for this grounding game: seeing, feeling, hearing, smelling, and tasting.
First, what can you see right now? Look around and name five things you can see.
Next, what are four things you can touch right now? It could be your arm or knee, the floor, a book, a table… If it’s safe to do so, reach out and touch them, noticing the texture: is it rough or smooth, warm or cool, hard or soft?
Now, let’s close our eyes and pay attention to what we can hear. Can you hear three different sounds? IIt could be the sound of my voice, birds chirping…if you can hear just one sound, that’s okay. You can focus on that one.
Two more. These can be a bit tricky depending on where we are. Let’s pay attention to what we can smell right now. Outside we may smell the grass, flowers…if we do this indoors, we might smell dinner on the stove, a scented candle…If you can’t smell anything right now, think of your favorite smell.
Finally, let’s focus on our sense of taste. We’re not eating anything right now so we can think of our favorite food and how that tastes. I love sugar cane so I’m thinking about that right now, mmm!
And we’re done!
SERENA: Now, do you feel a bit more…calm? Present?
REDGE: Serena, you’re the calmest capybara in the forest.
JONATHAN: Thanks Serena!
SERENA: Of course! But like I said, we’re always learning. I was feeling jittery about doing something new tonight too, Big Bad. So this was even a good reminder for me!
BIG BAD: Really?
SERENA: Definitely!
REDGE: Sometimes I get nervous when I’m brand new at something and have to try in front of other people.
JONATHAN: Oh yes, I experience that too!
BIG BAD: So…I’m not alone?
SERENA: Definitely not. And sometimes it might help to remember a time when you had to do something new…and it went well! You’ve done this before and can do it again.
REDGE: How do you feel now, Big Bad?
BIG BAD: I feel…better. And I’m ready to go back to school, see my Professor and old classmates, and meet my new classmates! And I will be mindful of moths, and ready to dodge if anything flies near my mouth.
JONATHAN: And you know you’ll be extra-fine because you always have friends like us!
REDGE: Exactly.
BIG BAD: Thank you all!
JONATHAN: Come on, let’s all walk together to the school!
BIG BAD: That would be great.
SERENA: Maybe along the way you could practice some howls and teach us about what you’ve learned.
REDGE: Ooooo, I’d love to learn a howl or two.
JONATHAN: Oh yeah! What was that one about reading a cool book?
BIG BAD: Oh right. The “I just finished a really awesome book and now I want to talk about it with everyone” howl. It sounds something like this! (Big Bad demonstrates)
REDGE: As an esteemed hedgehog who likes to get groovy…
BIG BAD: You want to hear the ‘Everybody Boogie’ howl?
REDGE: You know it!
BIG BAD: (Demonstrates the Everbody Boogie howl)
REDGE: I love it!
SERENA: Hey, do you have a howl that’s like a meditation?
BIG BAD: That would be the ‘Calm, Cool, Collected Canine’ (Demonstrates the howl)
SERENA: Beautiful!
BIG BAD: Do you want to hear the “Superpower Level Up” howl?
REDGE/JONATHAN: Yes!
BIG BAD: Well that one goes kinda like this…
JONATHAN CORMUR: This has been a Jonincharacter production. Today’s story was written by Amy Thompson and edited by Molly Murphy. Jonathan, Mr. Redge and the Big Bad Wolf were performed by Jonathan Cormur. Serena was performed by Chanel Tsang, the host of Peace Out Podcast and author of Peace Out: Calm Down Workbook for Kids. Sound recording and production by Jermaine Hamilton at Hamilton Studios. Reach out to us on Instagram or email us at dorktalesstorytime@gmail.com. Find links in the show notes or go to dorktalesstorytime.com. Now, go be the hero of your own story and we’ll see you next once-upon-a-time!
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